For those of you who do not know me, my name is James Shepherd, Youth Pastor at Community Baptist Church in Altoona, PA. When I was growing up, I gave my parents a very hard time, especially during my teen years. Both of my parents did an excellent job of balancing disciplin with love and instruction. I am excited to introduce my mom to you today. Here name is Rose Shepherd and over the next several weeks we will be posting additional blog articles on each of the 7 tips she mentions below. I hope they are not only a blessing to you, but a practical guide in developing the right relationship with your teenager, the way my mom did with me. Here is the introduction article by Rose Shepherd…
It is overwhelming to make sure you stay “at the helm” of the life of your teenager, isn’t it? A teenager is master at nagging to get his or her way. Here are a few ideas that might help:
- Be a cheerleader for your teen. Make sure you are on the same team as your teen. You are not the enemy! Make sure he or she knows you desire his/her best interest.
- Take plenty of time to explain why you are setting the limits. Your teen needs to know why. He or she will soon be making his own decisions in life and needs to know how to do it right.
- Make sure your expectations for your teen are realistic. Don’t expect your teen to live on a higher character level than you do yourself!
- Never be afraid to admit you made a mistake and to apologize.
- It’s O.K. to learn together. If you are just learning Bible principles, explain to your teen that you’ll be learning together how to live by those principles.
- Don’t back down! Be consistent in your expectations. Once you’ve made a rule that is right, expect your teen to live by it all the time. Decide in advance the punishment if he or she breaks the rule. Let your teen know in advance, too. No need for yelling or arguing (it takes two to argue); just follow the prearranged punishment!
- The greatest tool in rearing any age child is to build a close relationship. Your child or teen should be sad to disappoint you.
Read, “Thoughts From my Mom – Part 2” on Being a Cheerleader for your Teen.
